Spending the day with Dad was a good idea. I’m glad he asked me to come down. The local authors meeting was pretty cool. I got to talk to other writers about my work and it felt good to have people listen and at least look interested, and they had some advice to give me on how to sell a screenplay. I can’t decide which screenplay to start first, the hotel one or the college one. I think both ideas would be fun/funny enough to keep me interested, and I have decided I want to have ten pages of one of them written by next Friday. I have scattered scenes written for both, but neither script has an opening scene at this point. Is it okay if I don’t start at the beginning? Too late. I want my laptop back. I’m going to have to borrow Brandon’s and take it to Cup O’ Joe for hours on end, like I did to finish “Beacon Alley” last winter.
All in all, Wednesday was kind of a good day. I probably didn’t need four hours in a car by myself, but I wasn’t feeling sorry for myself the whole time. Sure, I listened to a lot of music that made me think of my mom, including the song I posted yesterday by The Weepies. But I also listened to other music that cheered me up, like Guster and No Doubt. On my Facebook status that morning I posted a line from a Jordin Sparks song, “Tattoo,” a pop song that I am pretty sure isn’t about anybody dying, and I listened to Pink’s “Who Knew,” which I am pretty sure is. So what, I like pop music. Sue me. “Tattoo” came out around this time two years ago and it made me think of my mom then: “You’re still a part of everything I do; You’re on my heart just like a tattoo.” The Pink song came out around that time as well, and I can barely stand to listen to it: “If someone said three years from now, you’d be long gone, I’d stand up and punch them out, because they’re all wrong… I’ll keep you locked in my head, until we meet again.” On the way home, I listened to that My Chemical Romance CD, “The Black Parade,” which I got from Dennis last year. It took me by surprise at the time; somehow it made me feel better when I first heard it, and it still did on Wednesday. I remember I kind of poured my heart out to Dennis back then and he was really cool about it. So, thanks to Dennis for letting me ramble on via e-mail when I was in a new city with a new life and a big issue to come to terms with. And for all the awesome music, of course.
I read my entry from last year’s experience and I can see I fared much better this year. They say that first year is the hardest, which I can now say to be true, in my case. I got a lot of nice e-mails and notes from people who were thinking of me that day, and if you were one of them, I thank you for it. It would be awful to me if Nov. 11 came and went and no one remembered. I expect down the road it will be easier but these first couple years, it’s nice to know other people are remembering and thinking of her.